My friend has been to Mind for me, and she's arranging a meeting for me with them at the beginning of next week.  They might be able to help get the fee for obtaining my notes down, and they can help me make my complaint. I need to bring notes on what happened.  Which means going back through the posts I wrote on here and writing a concise version.  I'm kind of nervous about it, because I know reading it all through again is likely to put me in a bad place, mentally.  But it needs doing, and better to do it while I'm in a relatively stable place than have to try to do it once my mood's really low again.  Probably best to leave it for tonight though.  Do it tomorrow or Sunday, in the afternoon, I guess.

My mood's in a melancholy sort of place at the moment.  I've been relatively stable lately, compared to how bad it gets, but sometimes I just feel very down and lonely, but in a peaceful sort of way.  Not a desperate angry despairing down, just a deep sad wish for something more, for my life to be better, for life to be better, to be not broken, to be not alone, to have some idea of how to pass my life in a way that will have meaning for me.  To be not crazy.

Sometimes I feel like I accidentally fell off my life and I don't know how to get back on.